Mila Halizova is an artist who creates large-scale artworks from collected natural materials, guided by her feelings and emotions. In our conversation, we discuss her connection to nature and how it shapes her practice, and how each artwork becomes a way to clarify emotions; emotions that take form as hope, love, nostalgia, gratitude…

Repose: How would you describe what you do?

Mila: I think for me now, it’s a reason to live, to live, because there were some moments, a lot of moments in my life when you finish believing in the world. And so you have only yourself in the world, and you should believe only in yourself and in your emotions, in your heart. If you do not believe in yourself, you can do nothing in the world. So for me, it was like two reasons to be alive, to enjoy life and be happy. I found this way because before it was a little bit dangerous, I lost a lot of emotions. It’s like the way I make my emotions physical. For me now it’s not possible to live without this and this connection between nature and emotion. It’s my way of talking to the world. Maybe it sounds crazy, but I know.

Repose: You translate your emotions into something physical, like your artwork?

Mila: Yes, because a lot of moments in life you can’t explain with words. You feel a lot of emotion in only one second. What you feel at this moment you can’t explain. You can explain only if you do something after. If some people understand, you are happy. For me it’s the most important.

Repose: What kind of materials do you use in your artworks?

Mila: I collect seeds, flowers, and I do big works. It’s a lot of meditative minutes. I think it’s about meditation. You collect together and it will be a surprise what you will see after. For example, when you collect a lot of acorn caps and you do an abstract portrait, you think it should be like this, but in the end it’s definitely different. This is a feeling. It’s pieces of nature. For example, if I use seeds, first it’s a long process to collect. You think about different situations in your life, philosophy, what happens in the world. After you put all these feelings when you clean these things and you grow from one process to a different process. You have a lot of answers to your questions. It’s super nice and very interesting. It’s a kind of therapy. You start to be clear in your mind. It’s like a lesson from nature and you get it after. It’s a connection.

Repose: What were you doing before you decided to do art?

Mila: Before I had a fashion brand, maybe ten years. All my life I collected a lot of materials from different travels and I didn’t understand why. I like pieces of nature, it’s beauty. I did clothes but it was not a success and it’s also about business. One moment it was too much for me and I ended that business. I spent time with my family and nature. It was like okay, who I am now. One situation in my life was a very strong experience about love. In that moment I understood I couldn’t not do this. I started to collect again and glue them on the frame. The first works were just for me. My friends said maybe you should show this work. I was not thinking I was an artist. It started like this, a very natural way, an organic way.

Repose: How do you balance your personal life and your creative life?

Mila: One moment I started to understand it was too much, because you wake up and think only about this. You finish your work at night and you don’t have time for yourself. It’s not good. You need time for rest and to enjoy life. I did only work before and I also started in Montenegro like this. I lived alone and worked almost all day. When I moved to France it started to be less because I needed to be more open to social media and people. It’s difficult to balance. I haven’t found it yet. I need a little bit to push myself to be more open.

Repose: What excites you about your project and where would you like to go in the future?

Mila: To be honest I’m not thinking about the long future. The most important thing is that I’m here right now and to be in the moment. If I have the opportunity to collect, to clean, to put on the frame, it’s already a lot. I’m enjoying this now. It will be nice to make an exhibition. It’s like my dream. I’m grateful for my atelier, for my health, and for my family. My goal is to be in balance every day.

Repose: Did you believe in this project when you first started?

Mila: I believed every moment when I worked in nature. I believed this energy gave me power. Sometimes you think, are you serious, you want to live like this. When you are in nature you don’t care about others’ opinion. You believe in yourself more clearly. In the city it’s a completely different lifestyle, a lot of people and energy. Sometimes it’s heavy energy but I need to be strong. When I was in Montenegro I was alone and didn’t listen to what my family said. They didn’t understand what I was doing. When you are alone you are a little bit closed. You just do what you want.

Repose: People sometimes want too many answers.

Mila: Yes, because when a lot of people are around you, you listen to a lot of opinions and you get a little bit lost. You ask where my opinion is. When you are in nature, you hear your voice  very clearly. When you are connected and calm, you hear your voice very clearly. Before I had an idea to make a camp, like a workshop. People would come and we would clean together. I really like this process. It’s like a performance. Sometimes it’s a little bit boring because you clean a lot and listen to podcasts or books, and mostly you listen to yourself. But it’s also nice to have conversations about life, not too much like in the city.

Repose: Where do you get the inspiration to put all the pieces together in a certain way?

Mila: It’s always different. It comes from my mind and from moments in nature. When I started to do the portraits, I was in nature and saw a very big, old oak tree. I sat under it and it felt like time stopped. I collected a lot of oak cups in my hand and started to put them together. In that moment a lot of emotions connected. My first portrait was very personal, about my story as a woman and my life. It connected many moments from my past. When I worked on it, I got a lot of answers about my story. It was super cool.

Repose: Do you want to continue on this way, to keep collecting and creating?

Mila: Yes. I’m interested in how everything can connect. Sometimes I like very minimalistic work. It’s difficult to photograph my work because sometimes it’s just a lot of seeds and you don’t understand what they are. In photos it can look like just something black. But I like this minimalistic story. For me it’s clear and beautiful, just pieces of nature together.

Repose: Do you need something to conserve the materials over time?

Mila: Yes, I do some processes with the materials so they are very dry and will not be destroyed. It was important for me to understand what will happen after many years. I already see how some plants look after five years. It’s perfect, nothing is destroyed and the color doesn’t change. It’s interesting because when you collect the same plants in different seasons, they have different colors. After I fix them with resin and other materials, they stay like this. I like to explore these different processes in my work.

Repose: Thank you for sharing your time and your story with us.

Repose Archive is a creative direction journal documenting processes and projects across art, design, architecture, and hospitality. As designers, we interview creative minds and explore their creations.  Photography credits:  Mila Halizova.